When I was a boy, my cousin—who also happened to be my best friend—moved into the neighborhood just behind ours. It was like a dream come true. It wasn’t right behind us like the next yard. We weren’t connected by roads, but by a stretch of woods, a washed-out creek, and a decaying bridge with only the hulking metal beams left. There were no streetlights. No sidewalks. Just, trees, grass, earth, and shadows. Between our houses was a journey, not a route. And that journey taught me more than I realized at the time.
One fall evening —one of those days where the trees are close to bare and the air feels thin, not quite cool but southern chilly—we were hanging with some of the guys in my friend’s neighborhood near their house. We were pulling dried stalks from their dad’s garden area and hurling them at each other like spears. We were laughing children at war with boredom and boundaries. The sun had since began its slow descent, and after a while I felt that familiar tug: You need to go now….soon. It’s going to get really dark. And soon enough, it did.
As artists and creatives, we know that moment well—the sinking light, the encroaching unknown. The moment where playtime ends or procrastinations needs to, and the solitary path begins. I had asked earlier when the sun was high, would they walk me home through the woods if I stayed longer. They said they would if I stayed. I took assurance in their words, plus I wanted to stay anyway. But time kept slipping by, and it finally became clear when the excuses started, that none of those guys were taking that trip with me. I looked in the direction of home. The space between the trees was a gaping dark hole, daring me to enter. Finally, in a moment of clarity, decision, and being fed up, I grabbed a handful of rocks—my version of protection —and headed on out, stepping into the woods all by myself.
Years later, I see that boy in so many of us. The ones with vision. The ones with stories lodged beneath their skin and colors in their souls. The ones who stand at the edge of the metaphorical woods, waiting for someone to walk them through the dark patch. Waiting for the invitation, the validation, the right mood, the funding, the perfect collaborators, the clean studio, the ideal conditions. But the truth is, the work begins where the light ends. The art, the creativity, the work, waits in the dark.
The truth is, we’ve all stood in that backyard at some point in our lives, playing around— then wanting, waiting for someone to walk us through the hard parts. Waiting for the timing to feel just. Waiting for the fear to shrink or for company to show up. Sometimes people mean well. Sometimes they don’t come though. Sometimes they can’t. And sometimes, the path you’re supposed to take is meant to be walked alone. You don’t need a full spotlight or a crowd of supporters. Sometimes all you’ve got is all you’ve got. Summon the courage to start. Sometimes you walk with shaking knees and pockets full of rocks. But you go anyway.
There are times in this creative life—heck, in any life—when you’ll need to go through the dark time alone (but are we really alone?). Not because no one loves you or believes in you. But because it’s your walk to take. Your vision to carry. Your bridge to cross. This is for the ones who are waiting. Waiting for someone to walk with you. Waiting for the right moment. Waiting for the perfect conditions. Waiting for a word from the Lord. Strongly consider moving past the wait because many people have gotten stuck right there and spent the rest of their lives telling stories of how they coulda shoulda woulda…That’s not you.
Grab your rocks. Use what you have . The path may be shadowed, but your gift was never meant to wait for perfect light or time. It was meant to create it. Go ahead and take that next step, even if it first leads you into the shadows and a season of silence. And when you do—tired, uncertain, carrying only what’s in your hands and heart—you will emerge not necessarily into applause, but into truth. Into the space you were always headed for.
Notes of A Native Son 